A good story

I like how you never know if next sentence will contain some sort of fancy vocabulary or a rare random cuss. Also hilarious metaphores/phrases ratio is well balanced - not overdone but one per chapter. Occasional slight references to various PoE community events are a nice addon as well.
Please proceed.

"Now", Beardmaster said menacingly, "Allow me to demonstrate the power of this fully operational beard!"

He sent the mental signal for his beard to stop playing possum and it suddenly sprung in to action. Its rapidly reverted to its natural length, approximately twice what appeared to be in its dormant state. Legend went for his blade as he started to stumble back towards the wall.

"Stay back!", he waved the sword haphazardly, but Beardmasters beard feared no mortal weapon.

"I gave you the chance to redeem yourself", Beardmaster glared as the distraught man, "I even offered to help, and still you came at me, bro."

Legend was backed against a corner and could see his fate closing in. He pleaded the fifth quite urgently.

'Let me have him', Beardmasters beard urged, 'make me whole again'

"My beard thirsts for your blood", Beardmaster advised.

"No! Please!", Legend stammered.

"Why should I spare you?"

Suddenly, Legend remembered the secret that could save his life, "Because, Beardmaster, in my ambition to master the powers of your beard I have learned the secret of it's origin."

Beardmaster paused and communed with his beard.

'What do you think?'

His beard took a moment to respond, 'I sense no deception in his words.'

He looked back up at Legend, "What do you know?"

just fyi this originated because I wanted to make a small beardmaster blurb for my signature, but it was too long

I have no idea where this is going

"

DaleWinters wrote:

"I gave you the chance to redeem yourself", Beardmaster glared as the distraught man, "I even offered to help, and still you came at me, bro."

Glorious.

I can just see someone turning Beardman into a cartoonish comic strip -- think Stewie from Family Guy.

I love it!

just got a round to reading this. good stuff man keep it going!

"

DaleWinters wrote:

I have no idea where this is going

Yes Dale, you do. Just let it happen, let the beard guide you.

*That moment when you realize you only copied half the chapter you just wrote. Fuck sake*

Don't let difficulties discourage you, we must know the origin.

Then I get busy at work lol

Unfortunately real tasks must take precedence over bullshit

But which of them is really the bullshit?

I think, deep down, we all know the answer to that.