What Happens When You Let An Algorithm Write the Delve Patch Notes

I ran the patch notes so far for Delve through a Markov Chain text generator and wanted to share its results with you.

  • You can now be cast a second time.
  • Challenge leagues are a great opportunity for a fresh start in a new notable which requires Nature's Reprisal.
  • Help inventor Niko the Mad harvest Voltaxic Sulphite to power his potent lights. You'll need those lights if you are to survive in the Help Panel about the Shaper as part of the Eagle.
  • The deeper you go, the more dangerous and fierce both the Life and Energy Shield.
  • Fixed a bug where Cold Snap did not require other sources of block. The exception to this is the same thing.
  • Deadly monsters and great treasures are waiting in the NPC dialogue window.
  • Repeatedly weapon-swapping is now modified by modifiers to skill duration and buff duration if those modifiers in some way affect the Hall of Grandmasters.
  • Added 26(ish) new Unique items, 3 of which were "snapping" between two animation states.
  • Bring flares to light your way when you hit an enemy with Static Strike.
  • All of your old characters and items are still present in the Labyrinth with the higher-tier spellblock mod.
  • Now has a dirty new trick up his weird fleshy sleeve.
  • The Totem Pole permanently showcases how many of the Witch.
  • Moved the player with a very short cooldown.
  • Items filters are now divided across 4 equal arcs (like pizza slices).
  • Items filters are now instant by default and can therefore be used while moving.
  • Items filters are now children hanging out in Oriath Square (the nice version).
  • These changes allow minion players to get into a bad state.
  • You may hear the slaves in the Quest Tracker.
  • Added 3D art for the Queen.
  • You can now right-click on a stash tab in the Coral Ruins map to be consistent with what the quest calls him. The other option was "Granddaddy Crab".
  • Weylam Roth's dialogue option never went away.
  • Niko's mechanical explorer, the Crawler, will guide you to bypass one of the Dead.
  • Added a new passive connected to the Ashen Fields.
  • We have more on the total number of monsters to spawn outside of the Hill.
  • Repeatedly weapon-swapping is now called the Dweller of the Sands questline.
  • Enemies can't be hit by both the darkness, and the Elder.
  • That guy who opens the gate to Lioneye's Watch now also causes increases and reductions to Minion Damage passives.
  • Now, there is no space in an area.
  • There is a sure way to die.
  • Please note that these changes also affect you.
Last bumped on Aug 28, 2018, 9:32:58 AM

I love this, i laugh hard every time!

but this scares me "Please note that these changes also affect you." o.O

Last edited by Zims911 on Aug 27, 2018, 4:54:06 PM
Finally, was waiting for this.
welp...looks like im first
edit:welp...looks like i was seconds away lol

edit after reading:omg thats so funny lol
it reminds me of thishttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nxsCZ2SEcQ
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Last edited by Thor_Inica on Aug 27, 2018, 4:58:27 PM
Granddaddy Crab isn't just an algorithm error : >
Uploaded an awesome Exsanguinate Freeze Explosion build on the forums - https://www.pathofexile.com/forum/view-thread/3508506
Last edited by Kiss_Me_Quick on Aug 27, 2018, 4:53:03 PM
"There is a sure way to die."
Bex_GGG wrote:
  • Niko's mechanical explorer, the Crawler, will guide you to bypass one of the Dead.

Phew! That's a relief!
Just a lowly standard player. May RNGesus be with you.
Fun. Hope that you're not writing the notes with this in mind though.
There is a sure way to die.

Bex_GGG wrote:
  • Now has a dirty new trick up his weird fleshy sleeve.

wot u say to me?
Yum Gibbs!

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