Am I clinically insane?

Peng, I had serious PTSD (still do but time heals all... blah blah) and it took me several tries to find a GOOD psychiatrist. Just like any doctors, it is, sadly, hard to find a good one. And even if you do, it needs to be someone that you have modicum of rapport with.

I think you should try another one. From what you posted that one doesn't sound like the answer for you. Don't give up. And please don't harm yourself. That is not the answer.
Censored.
"
Deadpeng wrote:


Please do not hate me. I am sharing my true thoughts tonight.



Do you mind if I share my thoughts, because I have a very close friend who is just like you except she became a man. And maybe my opinion could help you or w.e it's up to you.
Last edited by diablofdb on Jun 9, 2017, 10:14:56 PM
I'd lock half of you in the loony bin if it was up to me.

Spoiler
with hidden weapons and cameras all over the place for quality entertainment
Oblivious
"
Deadpeng wrote:
"
Bars wrote:


You've been raising all kinds of red flags in the forum lately. Just saying.

A consultation with a psychologist might not be a bad idea.


I actually consulted a psychologist recently. After nearly two months of detailed tests,

'Patient is extremely distressed and shows borderline tendency in inflicting self-harm. It is however expected that with such level of poor well being, she could not have functioned as a Ph.D student nor achieved the rest of her current academic excellence. Therefore, the study is beyond my expertise and inconclusive as the case is novel'


if you are extremely distressed and show borderline tendency in inflicting self-harm but generally successful you might be stuck in a state of mania, which wouldn't really be indicative of something like bipolar (since you'd need to show depressive states as well), but you might be experiencing depersonalization or dissociation

or you may be a privileged little boy experiencing some kind of pseudo-survivor's guilt or imposter syndrome.

either way, given that you posted this thread to begin with shows that there is something wrong with you
"
鬼殺し wrote:
No hatred. Hatred is expensive and best reserved for someone who has proven worthy of it over the years.

Take that MBTI test. I'm curious about the results.

(I'm glibly pretending that last post wasn't very creepy indeed.)






INTJ. The typical forum personality.
"
diablofdb wrote:
"
Deadpeng wrote:


Please do not hate me. I am sharing my true thoughts tonight.



Do you mind if I share my thoughts, because I have a very close friend who is just like you except she became a man. And maybe my opinion could help you or w.e it's up to you.


I appreciate honest answers. Just share anything since plenty have abused the freedom of speech here anyway.
"
Pwnzors87 wrote:
Do you feel strong tension above your nose,forehead and nothing in your backhead?

If yes, then you are actually afraid of pain in generall. Out of curiosity you try to overcome it, by harming yourself. A Borderliner trait.
Or do you want to see blood, to regain a sense of mortality.
Female have a bigger agmidala(fear) than men, maybe your female hormones have a negative Impact, but you sure don´t want to hear that.
But i quess your doc, told you that, or didn´t he?


These are strikingly true!
Going a little bit off topic in my question here, but:

Peng, do you often find that you suffer from depression or anxiety (not that either of those are in themselves an indicator for "insanity")? If you do, I would like to suggest a few forms of therapy that have helped me in the past and cost nothing.

Meditation and deep breathing exercises, when done correctly, can relieve a lot of tension!

Make sure you inhale deeply through your nostrils, hold your breath for a moment, then exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat as necessary. When trying to meditate, either clear your mind (I realize how difficult that can be in moments of duress, or for people who have never done so before) or focus on a singular thought.

I'd also like to suggest that you look online and examine the resources available on YouTube for "ASMR" videos. It's still pseudoscience, so I won't try to go into technical mumbo jumbo. Just know that most of the videos that try to illicit an ASMR response in viewers are created specifically to calm and soothe.

May help. May not.

Good starting points for content creators are Massage ASMR, ASMR Requests, Ephemeral Rift, Phoenician Sailor, Heather Feather, and Whispers Red. Don't let those names stop you from exploring if you discover that their videos don't do anything for you: there are really too many "ASMRtists" to name here.

Of course, none of these suggestions are a suitable substitute for real therapy. If you find that you constantly feel surrounded by pressure and you lack all motivation, please seek therapy to discover the root of the cause.
Bring back race seasons.
Insane, I don't think so, no. Personality disorder or close to it, possible. Extreme emotional fragility, most certainly.

I've already talked about the narcissistic traits as Charan mentioned. No, low self-esteem doesn't rule out Narcissistic Personality Disorder, in fact it's a prerequisite.

An important distinction between narcissism and NPD:

quoting someone else here
Narcissist

Narcissism can be summed up this way. There is self-esteem that normal people have, and the narcissistic self-esteem. This is tremendously inflated and a beast to be around. They really see themselves as special, better than the best niftiest person that ever lived. There is no chink in the armor; they are simply infallible in their minds. This of course varies in strength from person to person. People can certainly be on a continuum when it comes to narcissism.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

NPD is a personality disorder and is diagnosable. This comes in different strengths. The overwhelming continuum throughout is that they project a powerful ego while having nearly no self-esteem whatsoever in the real sense of themselves. They distract themselves from that gnawing emptiness by what is called narcissistic supply.

They are rather different conditions and present very differently. It is a common misperception that they are one and the same thing. NPDs are like hollow husks with a shred of a person inside. All of their bravado and grandeur is not only a show for you, but for themselves as well. To focus out onto the “person” they created, they can ignore the speck of a person they are.

The person that they are has a tremendously small sense of self. They have virtually no self-esteem if they have any at all. This causes them to be rather dedicated to the lie, and in that lie, they are infallible. They are Gods among men, and you (lowly human) have no place but to be grateful to be in their presence.


Now, do you have an actual disorder? Damned if I know, I'm not a professional. You do look like you have some of the traits. However, it's difficult to say because you've been tinkering with your hormonal balance, and that's bound to turn even a baseline stable person into an emotional wreck. Hormones regulate the fuck out of everything, including mood and personality. Of course you won't be the most stable guy out there, duh.

So, not really sure, and in the end diagnoses are a bit useless if they become a label or a crutch. "Oh, I have this and that, nothing to be done about it." Nope. There's always something to be done about it, in fact you can achieve amazing things with your own mind if you get down to working on it. The problem most people have is they think they are this immutable entity, everything is set in stone, nothing to be done about it. This is the easy approach, you absolve yourself of any responsibility, it's all out of your hands. The tricky part is, if you think like that, you are correct. Yes, you can't do anything if you start off on the wrong, unconstructive assumptions.

TLDR: What i think is you're emotionally unstable, not insane, and that is perfectly normal and understandable given the circumstances. You should remember it and try to regulate your reactions and try to mellow them out a little, and you can most certainly get better if you put your mind to it and work. Step one is identifying the problem, step two is finding out what can be done about it, step three is acting.

A lot of people fail at steps 1 and 2: they refuse to admit there is a problem, or they decide nothing can be done about it and there's that.

You are currently somewhere between steps 1 and 2. That's not a nice place to be in, but it can get better.

p.s. meditation and what Abdul was talking about is pretty neat. Not a magical solution to everything, but it's a cool tool in the box.

p.p.s. and for the love of god, please, just go to the proper bar and find someone who'll [beep] the [beep] out of you, as I said some time ago - I seriously don't get it why you're doing nothing about that as you obviously do have a need there

edit 3: you may want to try fetlife.com if it's about the kink, I've heard good things about that community and it's quite inclusive and broad minded AFAIK - you'll find people there who'll be more than happy to give you what you want.

edit 4: clinically insane people are typically convinced they are sane - the mere existence of doubts and questioning is a sign of sanity. Insane people are extremely sure of their version of reality.
The Wheel of Nerfs turns, and builds come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the build that gave it birth comes again.
Last edited by Bars on Jun 10, 2017, 2:04:57 AM
Psychology is a pseudo science based on wierdos I would not put much stock in it.
http://hci.ucsd.edu/102b/readings/WeirdestPeople.pdf

What "insane" in west maybe be perfectly normal elsewhere. While laws of physics applies everywhere.

I think you are fine, somewhere.:)
Git R Dun!
Last edited by Aim_Deep on Jun 10, 2017, 2:45:33 AM

Report Forum Post

Report Account:

Report Type

Additional Info