A joke for a Key?

Me and my friend love Diablo, but after some looking around we found Path of Exile. And when we found it, we went crazy with excitement, only later to find out that the beta is private for the time being.

So, my friend and I ask someone out there in the land of the internet, to be very generous and give us a beta Key, obviously, I don't expect two Keys, and we can make due with one.

If your on the same quest, post a joke, maybe someone will like it, and reward you!

My Joke:

Hey baby, I want to treat you like my wood, hammer you, bend you over, and nail you!

And, when I'm done with you....

I'll throw you in a wood chipper.




....literally.

Crime in multi-story carparks?

Thats wrong on so many different levels.

A man walks into a bar.

Upon seeing a dwarfish man playing the piano, he asks the barkeeper:
"Barkeep, why is there a miniscule man playing the piano?"
Grumpily, the barkeeper points to a magic lamp atop the tray.
"Rub it...", he snarls.

The man does as he is told, and sure enough, a genie appears and grants him a wish.
"I want to have a million bucks!", the man shouts enthusiastically.
*BANG* Suddenly the entire bar is filled with innumerable ducks.

"What is this shit?", he complains to the barkeeper. "I didn't ask for no ducks, i said BUCKS!"

"I sure didn't ask for a 11 inch pianist either", the latter replies grumpily.

What did the astronauts think when they found bones on the Moon?


The cow didn't make it!

My jokes are very weak, lol.

I place $20 into a box. So do you. There is now $40 in the box. I sell the box to you for $30. We both walk away with a $10 profit.

An irish-man walked past the pub.

How do you get an elephant into a safeway bag?

Take the s out of safe and the f out of way!

Come on beta key!!!

There was once a boy with no body, and he was just a head, and he always set on the windowsill watching other kids play. But one day there was a surgery to give him a body.

So he gets this surgery, and he then has a body, and after recovering from the surgery he asks his mother if he can go across the street and play with the kids.

His mother say "Ok, Son" so he runs out the door, onto the street and WHAAAAM!!! He gets him by a car, and get paralyzed from the neck down.


Moral of the story......quit while your a head.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.

Not screaming in terror like his passengers.

"

Multisensory wrote:

I place $20 into a box. So do you. There is now $40 in the box. I sell the box to you for $30. We both walk away with a $10 profit.

Person A: X
Person B: Y

"I place $20 into a box."
Person A: X - 20
Person B: Y

"So do you."
Person A: X - 20
Person B: Y - 20

"There is now $40 in the box." - Correct

"I sell the box to you for $30."

Person A: X - 20 + 30
Person B: X - 20 - 30 + 40

"We both walk away with a $10 profit."
Person A: X + 10 ($10 Profit)
Person B: Y - 10 ($10 Loss)