Favorite quotes from frequent off topic posters

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Brotherhawk wrote:

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This is my favorite signature.

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Upandatem wrote:

Winesap? Oh he's dead. Nasty accident. Don't worry. No-one will mourn one less lawyer in the world - there's death everywhere these days Johnny. But what gives human life its worth... anyway? Because someone loves it, hates it? The flesh is weak, Johnny. Only the soul is immortal. And yours belongs to ME.

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Brotherhawk wrote:

Look, I've boned a lot of fat chicks in my time, sure. But, as far back as I can remember, I've never fornicated anybody.

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ScrotieMcB wrote:

I have red hair, freckles, and crooked teeth. Don't need any more character!

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bhavv wrote:

Take it easy, mate. Last time you were in love you got married.

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MoonYu wrote:

I don't care how liberated this world becomes - a man will always be judged by the amount of alcohol he can consume - and a woman will be impressed, whether she likes it or not.

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VictorDoom wrote:

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

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MoonYu wrote:

i like to cover myself in bovril and slip around with my friends

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MoonYu wrote:

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ScrotieMcB wrote:

How is it you do not drown when you shower?

I'm fine, I have a nice new umbrella with colorful stripes.

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MoonYu wrote:

He's okay? He said he was gonna break my legs. And don't tell me he didn't mean it, okay? 'Cause he gave me the dead mackerel eyes. He meant it.

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Upandatem wrote:

Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he's also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh... he gets down to the end of his life, and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered, Those were the best years of his life, 'cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn't learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you're 18... Ah, think of the suffering you're gonna miss. I mean high school? High school-those are your prime suffering years. You don't get better suffering than that.

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VictorDoom wrote:

Listen to me, I got no reason to lie to you, don't make the same mistakes I made when I was young. Fuck a lotta women kid, not just one woman, a lotta women.

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Väkirauta wrote:

i like to quote myself, its like masturbating, but mentally