Deal with the bandits quest help?

Okay so currently im doing the deal with the bandits quest and decided to help instead of kill. After that i happen to get 3 new quest which is to help them, get their rival and i can get the resistance,hp and mana increase. My problem is when i tried to do it with a friend, after my friend died when the quest popped up. The only words available was goodbye and i changed my mind and the oak's rival and the other rivals were greyed out. Can you please help me on this? Do i have to do it with a friend that has not done the quest yet? Sidenote: my friend has already finished the quest long time ago.

Your friend probably chose to help//kill some other bandit than you have. So you have different states of allegiance to the bandit lords.

you still have to kill 2 of them...

you can either kill all of them to receive a passive skillpoint or let one alive to get the according bonus from that bandit.

bandits rewards changed with patch 0.10.0 (open beta):

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The bandit leaders now grant different stat bonuses on each difficulty level. For Kraityn, Alira and Oak respectively, they are - Normal: elemental resistances, maximum mana, maximum life; Cruel: attack speed, cast speed, physical damage; Merciless: maximum frenzy charges, maximum power charges, maximum endurance charges.

if your friend cancelled the game while you're in the bandits camp and the quest is not available just reload the area by ctrl+click on the waypoint entry and try again.

you will only be able to do the quest with a team which is dealing with the bandits exactly the same way as you. if your friend can't help just look for a party which says "kiling oak" or kraytin/alira to get the quest done.