D&D/ Tabletop Roleplaying Stories

Just wondering if anyone has any funny, badass, or just downright fun tabletop roleplaying stories.

My own contribution:
Just yesterday me and my tuesday group were playing the WH40k tabletop roleplaying game "Only war". A little bit of backstory is that we are on the planet Jericho, which is planet under the Adeptus Mechanicus, and we are their guests. The problem comes when our Regiment Captain had gone against the Commanders orders and sent us to an area with possible enemy occupation (Troops that deserted and were traitors to the Throne and the Imperium known as the Cantos B Company). There was no actual legitimate proof of the area being taken over by these Cantos Traitors, so the Commander would not dedicate resources to the area. The Captain took matters into his own hands and proceeded to send out an Illegal Aerial recon on the theatre of opertation, hereto known as Substation 13. As this act was illegal the Captain could not bring it to the commander under fear of penalization. As such he decided that he would send our platoon, the 9th company of 10th Seige regiment to investigate. We did this with our CO's knowing full well that it was an illegal operation and we would have no additional support.


Apparently it wasnt in sync for the full post >.>

EDIT:

Ah, I see the stories are supposed to be about epicness etc.

Cont...

So we went as a regiment of ~150 men and a few chimeras, Siegfried light tanks, Leamond Russ battle tanks, and two demolishers, with 4 Hydra Flak cannon platforms and a few Earthshaker Artillery cannons against ~200-250 men with Just as much tank firepower as us and were entrentched. Not a fun prospect since we would have no reinforcements either as it was, again, illegal. So we had to ration supplies, make sure everything was in order, and eventually, after 28 or so Teraan days in game, and 4 months RL time we had dispatched the Cantos. This is where we found instances of Heresy on the planet where the Tech Ward might be under the influence, or secretly worshipping the False God Mammon. So for us our operation was a success. however, when we tried to radio back to our captian we found out that he was arressted.

So we took our ~60 men and 2 tanks that we had left and went back to absolve our Captain. upon arrival our Commissar and our Ministorum Preist were arrested and brought into court as well. There one of our players created a Departmento Munitorum officer to argue our case that our findings were worth the costs. So it was ~5 hours of bureaucratic debate and was hella fun. A nice little side from the normalcy of Only war's constant combat. Of course it is only war, so after absolving ourselves and pissing off the newly Appointed JAG, we walked outside to only to realise the place we are at is getting attacked. As such, next Tuesday we start with "roll for initiative". Fun fact, as our Preist and Commisar were brought to court they were stripped of their weapons, so they are unarmed.

"

EDIT:

Ah, I see the stories are supposed to be about epicness etc.

It can be about any Tabletop Roleplaying experience, whether its funny, badass, or just plain fun! I dont think your post was against the set peramiters ^^

Over Christmas I played talisman with two of my brother like it was 89. Me and one of my bros got to the end together, he had a much stronger toon and resources, but I used up my life's rng by out rolling him with extraordinarily long odds.

Shit story, sorry you read it.

I have a really cool idea for a P&P setting/plot but can't find willing players. :(

"

ScrotieMcB wrote:

I have a really cool idea for a P&P setting/plot but can't find willing players. :(

Sorry man :(
I fortunately have a group of dedicated player I've played with for 7+ years, and they've been gaimg together for like 10-12. We constantly trade off as the DM/GM and have played multiple different systems and even created our own. (we've played D&D 3.0/3.5, d20 modern, Violence, Hkat, Dark heresy, Only War, Gurps, Rifts, Golden Sky stories, and others I cant remember right now.)

on a side note, the coolest thing that I havent seen in another P&P that we put into ours is something called residual fire. basically it was is where you would create a Line of Effect (LoE) after using a firearm. If any unit (allied or enemy) moved through that LoE they would instantly be subjected to an attack at a roll of 1d20 and if it was above their defense threshold it hit them for the damage of the weapon. This created an effect where Pinning was less of a roll(dark heresy and Only war's Willpower) and more of a decision of whether you want to run through that residual fire which was a lot of fun to mess around with. For a reference point, the highest base defense mod you could get was like 10 without cover.

Also, Scrotie, You can always do Forum gaming on places like http://www.giantitp.com/ or find a group on a forum and play with them at Roll20.net!

One time a party I was included in was traveling through some plains, on the way to a dark forest where a cult resided. The DM flipped through the book randomly to find some kind of encounter for us. His finger landed upon something, and he said "fuck it" under his breath.

Queue a party of 6 stumbing upon a talking whale that fell from the sky, bent upon suicide.

We mercy killed it, and our chaotic evil half-orc took it upon herself to save as much whale meat as she could carry.

Haha, it's your universe's Tarhiel from Morrowind!
Hmm. Tarwhale? Can't really come up with a good name for it...
On a sillier note, in one of the D&D campaigns we played we had a Dwarf with like 5 Int who was on point when we were walking down a cave system. He stopped us after spying some enemies
down the way. We asked him how many there were and he started muttering under his breath pointing them them saying "one.....one....one...". He did this for about 20 seconds then turned around and proudly declared that there was only one enemy very loudly. Needless to say they heard us, there were more than one, oh and they had black gunpowder bombs. Fortunately for us the first one fumbled and dropped theirs into the small pile of bombs and then we had to find a different way through the cave

Oh, god, so many. Hard to say which I enjoyed the most...I had a pretty crazy Pathfinder table a year or two ago. When the party came across a bunch of troglodytes, instead of hacking and slashing their way through the entire nest like good little adventurers the gunslinger found a way to sneak into the shaman/chieftain's lair. The rest of the party made enough noise to alert the rest of the troglodytes, but they didn't show up until after the party was already in combat. Just in time to witness the second-luckiest roll I've ever seen, in which the gunslinger crit the troglodyte shaman and killed him with a single bullet in front of all his worshippers. So the troglodytes decided that this weird guy with the magic exploding stick could be their new chieftain.

In service to their new chieftain, the troglodytes decided to offer their services as an untrained, badly armed howling mob of an army. Given their individual frailty, the party decided to let the troglodytes be while they finished exploring the caverns. Once they came upon a large cavern that led to a lake, they sent one party member running back to bring the troglodyte army forward to make a camp. As he went to fetch them, the rest of the party ventured onwards to an underground lake. Said lake contained a hydra that started wreaking havoc. The screams resulting from said hydra turned the marching troglodyte army back into a howling mob charging down the halls to save their new chieftain.

As it turns out, the hydra was the troglodyte's god. And just as the howling screaming mob turned the corner to see the desperate fight, that damn gunslinger got off the luckiest roll I've ever seen and crit the hydra. It died. The howling screaming mob turned into a silent genuflecting mob. And that's how one of my PCs became the god of a troglodyte clan.