Shades of the Past (Marauder Origin Story)

I think there's a mistype here:

"So you say now, but I have patience..."

It should be:

"So you say NO, but I have patience..."

as a conclusion of:

“NEVER,” I said, and my voice was not just my own..."
"
I think there's a mistype here:

"So you say now, but I have patience..."

It should be:

"So you say NO, but I have patience..."

as a conclusion of:

“NEVER,” I said, and my voice was not just my own..."


It's a more archaic wording - eg. The meaning = Thus you've decided right now
But the "NO" reading is great too

Also "the dying breath of the stars" is too metaphysically concentrated
it would be better if it was
"the breath of the dying stars" (think solar flare/expansion/d2 allusion) being more animated in the head since breath doesn't die

I notice the earlier phase of "the dark beneath...", and thought you had the construction for alliterative purposes (d b d b sound) or the "blackness" of the whole passage but it kills the imagery bit too much

Anyway I am rambling duelist is my fave so I am hoping its gonna be good
Thanks love
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Last edited by FullCust on Sep 8, 2015, 6:58:59 AM
Great stuff as always. Feels so short when you read it, because it is so good i want more! :) Thanks!
Ciao!
... Marketing tool?

Some people don't understand rpg at all.

Amazingly written, as the others.

Templar still owns.


This was a very enjoyable read, and by far your best effort yet. The intertwining of action, character development, dialogue and lore is done at a good pace, so that each section leaves the reader hungering to get to the next.

Thanks for writing these, looking forward to the next one.

PoE Origins - Piety's story http://www.pathofexile.com/forum/view-thread/2081910
Again a master writing.
Again you succeeded in making this, to me, low interest char a big piece in the wreaclast puzzle.

Love it how you describe the virtue gems effects we simply know as ethereal knives (scion origins), frost wall, generals' firestorm, bloodrage...

Cant wait for the others, especially the witch.
Ranger is clearly lesbo, hope that will be implemented as well:)

Vorici can shove his fuse up his [removed]
Hi

This is excellent not to good with words myself but really enjoy reading these
keep up the good work looking forward to the others

Drak :)
Good work, keep it up.
I've been looking for this for quite a while. Thank you so much for such a good read :)

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