What happens when you let an algorithm write the 2.0.0 patch notes

I ran tha patch notes so far fo' Da Awakenin all up in a Markov Chain text generator n' wanted ta share its thangs up in dis biatch up in yo' faaaaaace!

• Ethereal Knives: Now grants +2 ta tha nearest server.
• Elemenstrual Hit: Now has a mana cost n' a cold-ass lil cascade of Chaos spikes up in addizzle ta bein upsized variantz of aiiight skeletons.
• Fixed a funky-ass bug wit Conversion Trap where it could cause monstas ta strutt on tha overlay map n' minimap.
• Da startin Scion nodes now have mo' sockets n' mo' linked sockets.
• Yo ass can't hit tha same as Leer Cast.
• Oldskool maps done been reduced across tha tree.
• Our thugged-out asses have reviewed every last muthafuckin Skill n' Support Gem n' Vigilant Strike.
• Fixed a funky-ass bug wit Dominatin Blow dat could cause a variety of effects dat is one level above tha area of effect by 0.5% per 1%, n' no longer fronts dat they rotate mo' smoothly.
• Hoverin over tha past few years, itz expected dat not every last muthafuckin item holdz up as well as it once done did.
• NPC n' playa names is now less inclined ta battle tha user.
• Fixed a cold-ass lil camera bug dat was visible when rockin a Divine Orb on a existin stack of tha Path of Exile.
• Da game server you connected ta is now all up in tha ghetto map ta peep what tha fuck Tempest affects each area all up in tha pool of map modz up in previous expansions.
• Cybilz Paw: Increased Spell Damage Modz can now tab between Stream option text fields.
• Jam leadaz is now preloaded erectly. Yo ass can recognise these cuz they be lookin like volcanic KaruiStone squares rather than a existin stack of currency shit
• Demon Mackdaddy Added a funky-ass boss ta tha core game.
• Bloodlines Mods: Voidspawn of Abaxoth, Congealed Blood n' Bearerz of tha freshly smoked up progression. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.
• Atziriz Acuitizzle no longer attaches ta Da Warehouse District.
• Rather than always fleeing, Monkeys n' Drop Bears now flee if they hide under logs.
• Fixed a cold-ass lil camera bug dat juiced it up hard ta maintain tha top maps we want playas ta find it easy as fuck ta git ta tha core game.
• Da Bloodlines Mod done been replaced by Jewel nodes.
• Da intercourse fo' manipulatin hideout decorations no longer use /oos ta git ta tha effect (increasin tha total length).
• Da Waypoint up in Da Lower Prison has been removed n' instead Flicker Strike grants 20% damage reduction fo' a gangbangin' fresh start up in a freshly smoked up Dexterity/Strength Skill Gem
• Eternal Orbs no longer applies a penalty ta leech.
• Quest Rewards: Cuz of substantial balizzle chizzles, every last muthafuckin existin characta has been substantially reduced, includin joints on existin items.
• Vaal Pact has also been moved prior ta Vaal Ruins.
• Da Dread Thicket is now always 50%.
• Eldritch Battery no longer affected by magical Tempests.
• Minions (or other transitionable effects) pimped by triggered game can now craft Added Damage fo' Spells on a range of maps
• Da radiuz of tha Auras has been granted a optionizzle full passive reset. To use this, click tha "Reset all Passives" button on tha minimap screen, alongside other shiznit bout item filters
• Some of tha Auras has been added.
• Previously, da most thugged-out dat experience could be penalised ta was 2% of maximum game per second yo, but can be crafted rockin tha mouse wheel.
• Performizzle of findin a strongbox has been removed.
• Yo ass can now transizzle between areas.
• Traps can drop maps.